Speaking of Spiritual Maturity

Good morning. Delighted that you're here. If you're our guest, an extra special welcome. We're so glad that you're here. I'm I'm Bar Keo Seagan. I'm one of the pastors here. You know, when we sing that song about the blood, I hope you do realize that that represents the death of Christ on our behalf. So, we're not just talking about the liquid here. We're talking about the reality is an it's a figure of speech representing his death on our behalf. Now, if you're new to us or if you've even walked in just today, we want you to know that we believe according to the scripture that the moment we place our faith, our trust in Christ, that we are his forever more and he is ours forever more. Jesus said, "I am the way, the truth, and the life. No one comes to the father except by me. He said, "God so loved the world that he gave his only begotten son that whoever believes in me shall not perish but have everlasting life." If you've never place your faith to trust in Christ alone as savior, we encourage you to do that even today.

This message is written to believers because James, the book we've been studying, that author, the halfb brotherther Jesus, is writing to believers. So, I want you to know if you're here and you've not put your faith, your trust in Christ, you're kind of listening in on somebody else's business. But we're delighted that you're here and we hope you'll get something today.

The story is told of a young man who's working in the produce section of the grocery store. And a woman comes up to him and says, "I'd like to buy a half a head of lettuce." He says, "Well, I'm sorry, madam. We we don't sell half heads lettuce. We sell a whole head of lettuce. That's the way God grew it. That's the way we sell it." She said, "You telling me you're not going to sell me that half a head of lettuce?" "No, I I've told you we sell whole heads of lettuce." She said, "I have been at this coming to this grocery store all my life and you won't sell me a half a head of lettuce." He said, "Well, let me go talk to the manager." So, he goes to the manager. He says, "Listen, this idiot of a woman is over here trying to buy a half a head of lettuce." And the manager starts signaling to him, "She followed you over here." He quickly turns around and says, "And this lovely lady would like to buy the other half." Now, the manager is very impressed with this, but it wasn't until the end of the day that he got to get to this young man working at Produce. He said, ' Listen, I need to tell you this morning, I witnessed some of the fastest work on feet I've ever seen. You were incredible. And he says, "Well, I'm from Grand Rapids, M Michigan. We're famous for ugly women and for sports teams, specifically hockey hockey teams." And he says, "Wait a minute. My wife is from Grand Rapids. Well, which hockey team did she play for?

Today, as we come to our passage, we are continuing this idea that James is writing to believers and he's encouraging believers to grow up in their faith. James has no anticipation that a believer would stay a baby. And yet his fellow believers who now have been scattered throughout the Roman Empire because of the martyrdom of Steven in Jerusalem. Now all these believing Jews have scattered themselves about because they're being persecuted by the unbelieving religious Jews. They've been thrown out of their communities and they're struggling and they're under pressure. So that's why we call this series pressure points. And indeed they are under pressure even as he's writing to them. And as he's writing to them, he's noticing that there's some immaturity happening under this pressure. And these folks are backbiting each other. And they're fighting with each other. And the unity is slowly seeping away from this body of believers who we have commanded to love one another. Even as Christ has loved us, we should love one another. And by this all men will know that we are truly his disciples. And so he's writing to them about growing up. When he comes to this section, he's going to hit a hot spot. The issue of communication, our tongues, how we talk, how we communicate to one another, how we use speech to tear one another down rather than to build one another up. And so he's going to step into this and he say, "Listen, I need you guys to grow up."

So I've entitled this message speaking of spiritual maturity because he's continuing down that vein of, "Hey guys, we need to grow up." Now, throughout the text, we've been told to grow up. In fact, in in First Peter, we read like newborn babes, believers, long for the pure milk of the word so that by it you may grow and respect your your salvation. The minute you place your faith to trust in Christ, you're his. But now, it's time to grow up in your faith. So he's saying you're saved, but grow up. Become a mature man, a mature woman in Christ. Paul says the same thing. All the apostles are in agreement on this. Paul says this, "Speaking the truth in love, we're to grow up in all aspects into him who is the head, even Christ." Said, "All right now, baby believer, you're his. Grow up. You've been born again. Let's keep growing." Of course, James in this letter, the whole letter is about that. He says, "But prove yourselves. Demonstrate to others that you are doers of the word and not merely hearers who delude themselves. Keep growing. Keep growing."

And so now he comes to this issue of communication of the tongue. He's going to use the tongue obviously as an illustration and we do it all the time. You ever get a tongue lashing? Well, I was talking about how you're talking, right? You ever get uh get tongue tied tongue about you can't get the right words to come out. And so he's going to use this idea of the tongue that organ in our mouth to communicate the idea of we have this opportunity to speak in such a way to build one another up and not to tear one another down. And so he's going to talk about how we might tame the tongue, if you will. By the way, although this section is where he really hones in on our communication, how we talk to one another, it's not the only place in this letter that he's talking about it. He talks about it in almost every chapter. We see it in chapter 19. We're to be slow to speak and slow to anger. We see it in chapter 2. So speak as though as so act as those who are in to be judged by the law of liberty. In verse three, uh I mean chapter three, he says this, "For we all stumble in many ways. If anyone does not stumble in what he says, he is a mature man able to bridle the whole body." In chapter four, he says, "Do not speak against one another." In chapter five, do not complain, brethren, against one another. On and on again. This is really important, but he's going to hone in on it in these 12 verses. And he's going to talk to us about the power of the tongue, the power of how we communicate. He's talk about the problem of how we communicate. He's going to talk about the purpose for which we were given this ability to communicate. Now, we're going to talk about the tongue and speaking. But in this internet age, we're not just talking about talking to somebody face to face. We're talking about what you're posting online, what you're communicating on Facebook, what you're doing as you tweet on X, as you email back and forth, as you text with your thumbs. How you communicate is vitally important to your testimony of who you are in Christ and how you going to be used by him for his kingdom purposes.

So he's going to talk about how important is we we want to re be really really careful. I don't know about you, but there are times I say things and I'm embarrassed I ever said them. There are times that I'll walk away from a discussion and think to myself,"I can't believe I did not say such and so." So, he's going to talk about this with us, how important it is, how important it is for the unity of the body. Now, when I'm preaching a message like this, invariably somebody's thinking, "What's wrong? Who's in trouble?" Nobody is in trouble. There are no factions in the church that I'm aware of. We're all doing well. So, let's look at this as a preventative medicine.

The first thing we want to look at, he wants to highlight for us. If we're going to tame the tongue, if we're going to be those who speak with spiritual maturity, he looks at the power of the tongue. With our words, we can influence many. And he's going to use two illustrations. usually used uh the idea of the bridal, that bit that's in the horse's mouth. So, this huge animal can be controlled just because that bit is on his tongue or her tongue. It's talking about the ship and the rudder, how large these ships are, these oceangoing vessels, and yet they're completely controlled by this little bitty rudder by compared to the rest of the ship. So he says verses 1-4, "Let not many of you become teachers, my brethren, knowing that as such we will incur a stricter judgment, for we all stumble in many ways. If anyone does not stumble in what he says, he is a perfect man, or some of your translations properly say, a mature man, able to bridle the whole body as well." Now if we put the bits into a horse's mouth so that they will obey us, we direct their entire body as well. Look at the ships also, though they are so great and are driven by strong winds are still directed by a very small rudder wherever the inclination of the pilot desires.

Now this first verse is a tough one. Let not all of you be teachers, my brother, knowing as such you will instruct, you will encourage stricter judgment. Now, I have to tell you this is the verse that sent me to seminary. Now, scripture says very clearly that once you place your faith, your trust in Christ, you will not be judged concerning whether or not you're getting into heaven. Truly, truly I say to you, he who hears my word, my message, and believes him who sent me, Jesus said, has currently possesses eternal life and does not come in a judgment but has passed from death to life. But here what he's talking about is the judgment at the bema seat of Christ that every believer will experience. Yes, we're a guaranteed heaven. And now we're going to stand before Jesus. Luke 12:48 says this. Jesus speaking, from everyone who has been given much, much will be required. See, you've been blessed to be a blessing. You've been biblically educated to be a blessing to others. And when you stand before Jesus, you can say, "Okay, you're mine forever more. What did you do with what I gave you?

That's why it says, "Let not all of you be teachers, my brethren, knowing as of such will curse stricter judgment." Why? Because when you teach, you have the power to influence many. Which means you can bless many or you can lead many astray. He says, "Hey, you better cut it straight. You better be sure what you're doing." Romans 14:10 and following says this, we will all stand before the judgment seat of God. Literally the bema seat, for it is written, he's writing to believers, this is a letter to the Romans, as I live, says the Lord, every knee shall bow to me and every tongue shall shall give praise to God. So then each one of us, Paul is speaking now in Romans, will give an account of himself to God. Perhaps that's why the psalmist wrote in Psalm 14:13, "Set a guard, O Lord, over my mouth. Keep watch over the door of my lips." There's two things I do just before I get up here. First thing is I check my fly. And the second thing I do, I say, "God, guard my lips. Let me not lead anyone astray."

Now, what's interesting about this is that God does expect every one of us to at some level become a teacher. You may not be called to stand on a stage and speak to a congregation, but we're all called to learn of the Lord and to pass on what we have learned. So the writer of Hebrews says this in Hebrews chapter 5 12 and following. For though you should in fact be teachers by this time, speaking to the whole congregation, you need someone to teach you the beginning elements of God's utterances. You have gone back to needing milk, not solid food. For everyone who lives on milk is inexperienced in the message of righteousness because he is an infant. You hear the idea? We're all supposed to grow up, not stay babies. But solid food is for the mature whose perceptions are trained by practice to discern both good and evil.

So you read James 3:1, let not all let not many of you be teachers, my brethren, knowing as such you will encourage strict judgment. And you all say, I'm not doing that. And he says, now wait a minute. every single believer is to grow up in their faith and at some level share what you have learned with others. Maybe it's in a small group. Maybe it's in a Bible study. Maybe one day you would be called to stand before a larger group. But certainly you should be able to lead someone else to the Lord and lead a believer to growing up in the Lord. That's an expectation. It's why we all studied together. So that you would be equipped that when God provides that opportunity, you can speak words of life to those who desperately need it. And it's not just the unbeliever that needs words of life. Don't we all often need words of encouragement in life? God's desire is that we would understand the power of the tongue and they we were gifted with the ability to communicate in ways that the rest of us creatures have not been.

The next thing we want to look at, we looked at the power of the tongue. Let's look at let's look at the problem of the tongue. With our words, we can ignite trouble. Verses 5 through8 here, James chapter 3. So also the tongue is a small part of the body, yet it boasts of great things. See how great a forest is set a flame by such a small fire. And the tongue is a fire, the very world of iniquity. The tongue is set among our members as that which defiles the entire body and sets on fire the course of our life and is set on fire by hell. For every species of beasts and birds of re and reptiles and creatures of the sea is tamed and has been tamed by the human race. But no one can tame the tongue. It is a restless evil and full of deadly poison. Woo! Shut my mouth. That's pretty rough. Now, obviously, he's using some level of hyperbole, but at the same time, he lands with a huge thud. It's a restless evil. Have you experienced your tongue being a restless evil? Have you ever had stuff that you've said in anger or in foolishness that you wish you had never said?

God's desire is that we would understand the power of the tongue. He uses the idea of a fire. By the way, I don't know if y'all noticed or not in the news that those Palisades fire in California, 6,800 buildings, most of them homes burned down. Remember that 12 people died, perished in those fires. They've arrested a man, an Uber driver who was insulted or ticked off about something and purposefully set the fire. If convicted, he faces 45 years in prison. Think of the illustration. This is the illustration that James is using saying, "Don't you know with with that that very poignant moment if you say the wrong thing, you're going to set a flame of fire. Lord, guard my lips."

We've talked about the fact that James is the proverbs of the New Testament. And boy, he really takes off. A lot of these illustrations can come right out of Proverbs. And Proverbs has a lot to say about be careful how you speak. The power of the tongue, there's life and death in it. Proverbs 10:19 says this, "When there are many words, transgression is unavoidable." I remember that memorized this years ago because here's my problem. I get paid to talk, but with many words, transgression is unavoidable. But he who restrains his lips is wise. Proverbs 21:23, "He who guards his mouth and his tongue guards his soul from troubles." Proverbs 16:28, "A perverse man spreads strife, and a slanderer separates intimate friends." Throughout both the Old and the New Testament, we're warned not to be a slanderer. We're warned to be careful about gossip and whispers here and there and everywhere. He who goes about as a slanderer reveals secrets and therefore do not associate with a gossip. Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander be put away from you along with all malice. Paul says in Ephesians 4, Peter says this, put aside all malice and all gile and hypocrisy and envy and slander. The psalmist writes an entire song about it. Here's what he says. Psalm 15. Oh Lord, who may abide in thy tent? Who can have close fellowship with you? That's what it means to abide in the tent of the Lord means you have close fellowship with God. Who may dwell on thy holy hill? He who walks with integrity and works righteousness and speaks truth in his heart. He does not slander with his tongue, nor does evil to his neighbor, nor takes up a reproach against a friend.

You know how vital it is that we protect the unity of the body of Christ. You know how vital that is, how important it is. know your elder board made up of 10 men. We meet at least monthly officially. Every now and then we might have to do a little extra work on the side there. But uh we had a discussion even this past meeting to remind one another. If someone in this congregation comes in our church family comes to an elder to share something, the elder needs to remind that person when you share this with me, you're sharing it with the entire board. So before you go any further, just know whatever you tell me, I'm going to talk to the entire board. And the reason is because too often in churches, people who want to cause trouble go whisper in the ear of one elder and then somebody else go whisper in the ear elder and before you know it, the elders are not unified. And so we want to know everything together so that we remain unified. If the board's not unified, I assure you that means the church is not unified. Can't even tell you how many churches I'm aware of who have split because the elder board got split over nefarious people. By the grace of God, that has never happened here. By the grace of God, it will never happen here. We're going to be unified. We're going to be those who minister together in unity. I'm not going to allow slander. If someone's got a problem, tell us. We'll help fix the problem. That's what we're about. We're about reconciliation.

In Proverbs, the writer of Proverbs uh uses this little phrase. He says, "There are six things which the Lord hates." Wow, that's a biggie. Yes. Seven which are an abomination to him. Now, this is a figure of speech. There's six. Seven is the perfect number. So, he's saying, "All right, I'm going to lay it out for you. Here are here are the main things you got to be careful of. God hates this stuff." And he starts listing them out 1 through seven. Now, we normally we we're going to list the worst thing up front. Not so in this figure of speech. The worst is what comes last. Number seven is considered what he hates the most. And so in Proverbs 6:16, here's what he says. There are six things which the Lord hates. Yes, seven which are an abomination to him. Hotty eyes and a lying tongue and hands that shed innocent blood. A heart that devises wicked plans, feet that run rapidly to evil. A false witness who utters lies. and one who spread strife among brothers. Someone who caused strife and just start wi wiggling themselves in between relationships and causing people to be torn apart in their relationships. He hates that more than those who take innocent blood. Why? Because we are the ones who represent him on this earth today. And if we aren't unified in loving and encouraging one another, we have no hearing to those who desperately need to know the truth.

We've looked at the power of the tongue. We've looked at the problem of the tongue. He who guards his mouth and his tongue guards his soul from troubles. Alan Redpath years ago, I was reading him and he came up with this wonderful little acronym. You know, you're in a situation and you you have to confront somebody and you want to make sure things are going to go well. Want to guard your lips, want to say things that's going to be helpful. And he came up with this acronym and his acronym is think. Each letter representing another idea. He says, "Look, you're you're in this circumstance. You're trying to bring things together. Before you speak, think. Is what I'm about to say true? Is what I'm about to say helpful? Is what I'm about to say inspiring? Is what I'm about to say necessary? Sometimes we say stuff you just don't need to say. Is what I'm about to say kind?

You know, I do a lot of premarital counseling and uh when those couples come before me, the first thing I explained to them is, "Listen, I'm a facilitator. You're only going to get out of this what you put into it. My job is to help you have as few surprises on the other side of the altar as possible. But there's still going to be some surprises. And so my second job is to equip you to handle those surprises that come on the other side. And so we kind of go through their background and who they are and where they're from, what their parents uh were like to them, what their siblings were like to them, what their mindset is. We be begin with are you both believers? You both belong to God's forever family. Then we start talking about all the important stuff. And believe me, we get to the stuff that eventually there's going to be a fight. We're going to get there. In fact, I'm kind of hoping we do. You've heard me say this many times. If two adults living under the same roof for any period of time and they come to me and tell me they never fight, I I know one of them is dead. They might not be dead physically, but they're dead emotionally because they're not speaking truth. You can't help but rub each other raw a little bit. It happens. Question is, what are you going to do then? One of the lessons is how to have a good fight. What do you mean a good fight? A productive fight. One where you actually work it out.

You know, when you're in a fight, the first thing you want to think of is this. Am I trying to win the fight or am I trying to win the person? That's the question. Years ago, I had a father come to me and I knew him, knew his family, and he and his daughter were estranged from each other. And he wanted to have a cup of coffee with me and talk to me about it. and he's telling me, you know, how horrible she is and I can't believe that, you know, she's isolated herself away from him and he's telling me about one of the arguments and he tells me what he said and what she said and what he said and she said became very clear to me the guy's trying to win a fight and I just asked him, "Listen, I got to tell you, sounds like you're trying to win the fight. I thought you came here to find out how to win your daughter. You got to decide what what's it going to be. You can win the fight. Sure you can. Is that what you want?

I'll tell you the most powerful words you could say. You ready? I'm sorry. Most powerful words you can say. I'm sorry. By the way, gentlemen, I don't know if you know this. If you happen to be married, do you know that it's your job according to the scripture to initiate reconciliation in every single fight? Did you know that? You're the initiator. Ephesians 5 says that we are to love our wives even as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her. You know what Jesus did? He initiated. We He didn't wait till we were coming to him. He came after us. We're to initiate reconciliation. By the way, even when you're right and she's wrong, but that would never happen. I know. I can't tell you the number of times I'd have to go up and tell my bride, "I'm sorry." And I can tell you how many times she was wrong and I was right because they fit well, not even on this hand. Most often she's right, but there are some times when she's wrong. And you know what? It's still my job to initiate reconciliation. It's my job to say, "I'm sorry for what's going on right now. I'm sorry for the way I said that. I'm sorry that you took it that way. Will you allow me to restate myself? Can I tell you what I really wish I had said?

I had a young couple not too long ago coming to me for free counseling and we got into this and they were like, "This is the stuff we're waiting for." And uh he talked about the groom talked about the fact that every now and then they get in a fight and his his bride would uh would turn her head. And he'd have to say, "Please look at me." So she had this habit whenever if he hurt her feelings, whether he intended to or not, she would turn her head and she wouldn't even look at him. And I said, ' That's the greatest gift ever. Are you kidding me? See, our brides expect us to read their minds, and we know we can't. But she's given you a tell. You'll know if she turns her head and won't look at you, you'll know immediately something you said caused a problem. And then say, "Sweetheart, I can tell that something I said upset you or hurt your feelings. I want you to know I'm sorry. I still don't know what it is, but I promise you if you'll re-engage with me, I'll figure it out. There's nothing else I want more than for you and I to be on the same page.

How about you ever had a friend who uh you've known him so long that that you can tell when things are sideways and you you get this high privilege of being the one to initiate reconciliation. What a glorious thing to have the power of the Holy Spirit within that. Yeah, I can do this. By his grace and his mercy, I will pursue reconciliation with you. Talking about the power of the tongue, we're talking about the problem of the tongue. Now, we want to talk about the purpose of the tongue. With our words, we can invoke blessing. Look how he says it in verses 9-2. With the tongue we bless our Lord and Father, and with it we curse men who have been made in the likeness of God. From the same mouth come both blessing and cursing. My brethren, these things ought not to be this way. Does a fountain send out from the same opening both fresh and bitter water? Can a fig tree, my brethren, produce olives? Or a vine produce figs? Nor can saltwater produce fresh? What is he saying? This this should not be things. We We should speak congruently with who we are, with who God has made us to be. Those who bring blessing and peace. Those who woo others into reconciliation both with God and with ourselves.

With our words, we can be those who bless. Proverbs 18:21 says it very starkly. Death and life are in the power of the tongue. and those who love it will eat of its fruit. I wonder if you ever been in a situation where you've seen maybe in public a mother or a father say something to a child so damaging that you just want to stop and catch your breath. And you think yourself, you just killed that child's spirit. Do you know what you just did? Or perhaps you've been uh on the side of a soccer field and something happens and a child completely screws up and a coach who actually represents Christ well runs up and says, "Hey, you're still doing a great job. It's okay. That happens to all of us." Words of life. That, my friends, is who we are called to be. Paul says it this way in Ephesians 4:29. Let no unh wholesome, literally putrid word proceeded from your mouth, but only such a word that is good for edification, for building someone up according to the need of the moment, so that it will give grace to those who hear. Apostle Peter puts it this way. Whoever speaks is to do so as one who is speaking the very utterances of God.

One time Jesus is uh teaching and he's got a large crowd of disciples, not just the 12. And uh as he's teaching and preaching uh the Pharisees show up and they just giving him all kind of grief. And at this point in his ministry, Jesus actually told his disciples, "Okay, from now on, I'm going to shoot you clearly, but everybody else, I'm going to start talking in parables because if they really want to know the truth, they'll come and pursue me for the meaning of the parables. And if they don't really know, it's not for them to know. So at one point, he finally says,"Listen, unless you're willing to eat my body and drink my blood, you can have no part with me." Now, he's talking about communion, which he's going to take the Passover and transfer it into communion as a representation of remembering what he has done for you and me. He took on a God took on a physical body, the perfect God man that he would represent us before heavenly father and then he would die for us. The blood representing his death. But they start murmuring among themselves. What this guy turn to a cannibal? You want us to eat flesh and drink blood? What are you talking about? He's speaking in parable. So the crowd starts dispersing and Jesus turns to the 12 and he says, "Will you leave me as well?" To which Peter says, "Where else are we going to go, only you have words of eternal life?"

Do you know that's true of you? all of us who are his children through simple faith in Christ. We're the ones who have the words of eternal life. People are searching everywhere. We have it. Jesus said, "I'm the way, the truth, and life. No one comes to the Father except by me." We're the ones that have words of blessing, words of life.

In this book uh in search of the source Neil Anderson tells his story. He was a he was a missionary to an unreached people group in Papa New Guinea for over 20 years and he lived among them for the purpose of learning their language to be able to translate the Bible into their language. That's not an easy thing to do. Took him well over two decades to do this. But he lived with them. He already moved in with them. He built a hutch. He had a thatched roof. One day he's up there building and working on his roof. And one of the villagers is helping him and he throws him this axe and he went to grab the axe and he missed it and the axe fell and it hit another villager and it cut him. It tore his shirt. So deal got down as quick as he could and found his medicine kit and he started fixing the guy's wound and it turned out to be somewhat superficial and he was able to help him and but it also tore a shirt. It was a shirt wasn't much of a shirt to begin with but all of his clansmen started coming around and they started murmuring making loud noises and and Neil Anderson's trying to figure out I'm not sure what's going on here. But then Neil Anderson, he'd already patched the guy up and he went into his hut and he found a shirt and he brought a shirt to him. He gave him the shirt and all of a sudden everything calmed down and he realized they have a high view of justice. You tore my shirt, you fix my shirt or you give me another one. He goes, "Oh." And he's thinking, "Okay, maybe I can use this." And the word they use means trade. Somehow he made a trade. And when he was done, they used another word that meant enough. Okay, that's enough. And he's thinking, "Wow, okay, let me think about this." Some months later, one of the villagers is cutting down a tree and there's a woman working by the river and she's washing clothes and the guy who's working on the tree calls her and says, "Hey, you got to move out of the way. The tree is coming down." And he's working on the tree before the tree started falling before he expected it. And so he yells to her to move. Well, she doesn't move in time. Tree hits her and kills her. And that young man ran into a particular hut in the middle of the village and hid. And all of her clan came up with war in their eyes. And they're murmuring. They're marching and they're murmuring. And suddenly from behind that hut, that clan of the man who' accidentally killed the woman starts coming out with with goats and with pigs and staking them down and bringing tools out and more tools out. And Neil's just watching this whole thing happen. And finally, finally, one of them yells the word for enough. And they take all their stuff and the clan leaves. justice and Neil Leonard says, "That's it. I got my words." So he starts teaching the elders and he's explaining to them about the importance of the trade that God made for you and me. Now Jesus himself said, "It is finished. Enough." And one of the elders starts talking and he says, "We have we've given much in these situations before, but no one has ever given himself." And then he sat down and he said this with a sigh. We are dying for the deliciousness of this talk.

My friends, that's who we are to be. Those who when they hear us in their heart of hearts, they're thinking we are dying for the deliciousness of this talk. They have nowhere else to go. We're the ones who have his message. Would you stand and pray with me?